Thursday, 8 February 2018

Phuket Diaries: Day 1

1st Feb 2018 started with a 3:30 am flight from Don Mueang Airport to Phuket and we were all on the plane like we were drunk, especially me because I fell asleep as soon as I sat on my seat and woke up when the plane landed. I felt nothing nor did I hear anything during the entire flight. 
Got a taxi for 800 baht to Patong which was about a 40 minute ride from the airport. Luckily no traffic so we made it to the hotel in a jiffy(Surprisingly there were no multi-colored cabs like we see in bangkok here in Phuket except the limos/reserved ones or the red open back type jeepneys blasting latest chart toppers which are hiked up pricey depending on your thai speaking skills)...

We booked out hotel on Agoda and since we all had no idea about Phukhet, we were glad we booked Patong because it happened to be the happening scene of Phuket with beach, night life and great choice of restaurants. We arrived at about 6am at a small reception of the Paton Bay Residence Hotel located right by the entrance and even though we had early check in on our agoda settings, they were slightly hesitant on handing out our room keys but seeing our half awake faces she were empathetic. The rooms were ready and we got the keys and off we hit the beds right away. No such scenery from the window but a lot of construction adjacent to our rooms on the 4th floor. That morning we weren't bothered by the noise of the drilling at the site as fatigue came in sooner than we imagined. We all slept till noon and decided to freshen up and head out for lunch.

We came by a restaurant PS2 by a connected resort and had some Thai Food and made out way to the Beach. On the way to the beach we decided to book a tour for the next day to the islands. we chose Phi Phi Islands from a local tour operator called Top 10 and paid 1300 Baht per person to visit Phi Phi Islands+May Bay and Green Islands via Speed Boat starting at 8am inclusive of Lunch and return back in the evening with Hotel pick up and drop off. We are not sure if we were ripped off on the price but we saw on the brochure that it cost about 3000 Baht per person and we managed to get a good deal for1300 baht. (Not sure if it was a good deal or not as we forgot to ask the other passengers on the boat regarding their fare per person that day)...

Then we headed towards Patong beach. A nice place to walk around under the trees and the guys took a dip into the sea while I took refuge under a palm tree watching them gleefully swim in the salty waters under the scorching sun along with a few hundred other people on the beach as well. 
I slipped away from the hot sand under my feet in search for  bottle of water to drink but instead found myself walking towards a blue ice cream lorry playing a creepy tune (the ones that play in the movies and a clown is selling the ice cream) attracting people on the beach as it moved along slowly up and down the beach pathway. I had a plain choco bar and it sure tasted good after a really really really long time. 

The boys took a dip twice in the sea before calling it quits for the day as the excitement meter was slightly falling due to the hot sun and the salt in the water I guess. I was dressed in pants and hadn't come ready to jump into the sea like them so was left along the sands people watching and getting amazed at people and society...

The beach was mostly filled with foreigners (I could identify a lot of Russian speaking tourists and Chinese tourists). I didn’t expect a lot of Russians to be visiting Phuket so did a slight homework research and found out that a lot of Russians have settled here in Phuket and Pattaya after the Soviet Union with settled businesses and illegal operations running in the market. It is said that Russian mafia runs alot of the businesses here from restaurants, cafes, hotels to night clubs. Bangkok post reported that Russians are involved here in Phuket with gambling, casino, money laundering, buying national forests, luxury houses and real estates, and paying off corrupt government officials and police individuals. The gang that is prevalent here is called "Spachiba"...

Then we walked back to the hotel and rested a bit till it was time for dinner.

Wednesday, 24 January 2018

All Falls Apart

When it all makes sense
All senses fall apart

When the heart loves wholeheartedly
The love falls half apart

When trust is gained
All that is gained falls apart

When words leaned upon by strangers
Seems to weigh heavier than your own

Straight path lost in diversions
Emotions like a headless chicken
All breaks loose
All falls apart...

Monday, 1 January 2018

2018 Resolutions~

This year 2018:

I will try to make the most of my time with my family and my close friends. I will pick quality over quantity and prioritize my relationships with everyone of them. I will not let them dictate my life and choose my path for me. I will be patient with them and I will remember their birthdays/anniversaries every year whether their gesture is reciprocated or not. I will not have any expectations and be grateful for every small act of kindness shown to me. I will take care of my mother, call her often and visit her frequently too. I will not complain nor get angry at any given situation. I will avoid any confrontation with anyone and cut out all toxic/unhealthy relationships.

I will focus on being the best I've ever been and the most fittest I've ever looked. I will work on myself everyday and try to be better and learn more about myself as the weeks and months go by. I will try and stop every once in a while and remind myself to slow down and love myself time to time as well. I will try and wake up early mornings and embrace nature by going on walks often. I will be open to hiking and visiting new places every month and capture those beautiful moments.

At work, I will always be sincere and work with integrity.  I will work hard and reap the benefits of my labour at the end of every month and be proud of what I have achieved. I will  be productive and do some research to learn something new everyday. I will open my mind to the endless opportunities and explore avenues of learning. I will not complain when I have no work but instead I will use my time meaningfully to be proactive and productive in and outside my work sphere. I will try and read at least one book a month and reflect on it after I've read it.

I will continue to be kind and compassionate and help those who need to be helped but not letting them take advantage of my goodwill. I will have boundaries and also remind myself when I do no have enough myself that I can't help everyone around me whenever I can.

Wednesday, 13 December 2017


People and feelings are both weird
One minute you are on cloud nine
And the next you're falling straight from it
A steep drop...

How does one even give it a try again?
The ink from the pen written on the blank sheets
Emptiness in words that stay
Felt only through the scar of the etching of the rewritten pages

In the beginning I thought I was made for loving you
But my soul just couldn't be re-touched
I searched every corner
And I ended up alone...

My heart honors my intuition
But my soul is not here
I can't change into someone Who I am not
Nor can I pretend to be another person...

Friends lost, new gained
Blind love reckless burning
Regrets slowly fading
But how can one actually forget?

Monday, 4 December 2017


The feelings associated with departure
Always leaves a strong impression on me
That emptiness and the hallow feeling
Almost associated with loneliness...

Watching images drift away smaller and smaller
fading into the distance
my heart falls heavy each time you or I leave
yearning until our souls meet next...

The feeling you know so damn sure
And yet the heart is in complete denial

Why does this hurt ten times bad?
Why does this seem too hard to deal?
Why does this heart keep hoping?

If this love is pain
Well lets hurt tonight...

I'm suppose to be able to sleep With or without you
But this sleep is far drifted into the horizon
And I'm here wide awake
With all these thoughts running around without any goal...

Scar tissues unable to dispose
Skeletons out of the closet
Forgive and never forget

Trust lost
Trust gained
Decisions and enough with issues already!

Tuesday, 31 October 2017

Waiting For Romeo~

One of the most famous lines that struck me today was from Shakespeare's Romeo and Juliet, Act II, Scene II where Juliet is bidding goodnight to Romeo. She says:

"Good night, good night! Parting is such sweet sorrow,
That I shall say good night till it be morrow..."

 In the real world, Juliet found herself saying goodbye and not knowing when she will see her Romeo again. Even though his depart was a sweet sorrow, she was clueless when her morrow might be. She was afraid her morrow will never come again. Oh how she desperately wanted to see Romeo again but she knew it was not possible for a long time. Romeo was gone afar and this time she couldn't really stop him from leaving.

Juliet knew deep down in her heart why he left and she let him go slowly knowing he would return to her one fine day. She felt heavy hearted and something inside her was missing when he left. He was always what kept her heart beating anxiously and waiting for news of his arrival is all what she was anticipating for.

This time she knew it was true. She didn't mind this time seriously! Somehow she wanted to be this person always and maybe this was who she was all this while. She was stronger and made more difference around her and he was always supportive of her efforts. He had a big heart as well and somehow that's what made him beautiful too. Maybe that's why she and him were both beautiful souls waiting like the stars to collide.

Days soon turned into weeks, she was searching for all the memories she could hold on to. Romeo was far away, unreachable by anyone besides his own kind. Juliet was dealing with her own issues in the mean time. She has a lot of house keeping to do and that stressed her every single day waiting, hoping and praying! She wanted to start right this time on a clean slate and she knew it was the best way to start her new life but she had to wait...

If only she had the support from her parents.. She was sorry she fell in love when she wasn't suppose to. She was someone better when she was with him and she knew he was better with her as well. Romeo and Juliet confessed of their love and both of them knew that in the beginning it was merely passion that soon turned into love but later on he realized that he needed her in his life just as much as she would be the one who could bring him happiness.

Everything she needed was in front of her and she knew that she was going to be alright if she believed in her self a bit more but she couldn't ignore the signs that she was getting. The feeling all seemed a different purpose that she didn't want to admit.

Juliet waited a few more days in pain but alas she was relieved to know that she was alright. The pain was suddenly gone and then she began to promise herself that she would never ever go back towards the path she once took that went off-road as the lights were unclear and there was another paved road at the junction. Juliet found herself through this experience and saved herself from herself.

She continues to wait...
Wait for herself
Wait for her Romeo... 

Sunday, 17 September 2017

This Hurt

Like smoke rising from the wet tiles
It slowly began to hit me
with arms wide open
I screamed on the top of my lungs
"It is what it is, It was what it was and It will be what it will be,
So come what may..."

I sat down in the middle of a half empty room
packed boxes and an empty cupboard
faded smell of the fragrances
tears swelled and I couldn't control

The heart sometimes deceives you
leads you on a whole different journey
we are all dealing with our very own demons
But morning will always come.

I've laid down my heart
Initially Loved you more than Love could  have ever known
I wasn't expecting to turn my heart around
Now I'm dizzy and I cant see straight
Even my heart has gone cold...

The road to redemption isn't far
The road to recovery is near
I am definitely stronger than I seem
and this hole in my heart will be...

Will be... but a memory...