This Hurt

Like smoke rising from the wet tiles
It slowly began to hit me
with arms wide open
I screamed on the top of my lungs
"It is what it is, It was what it was and It will be what it will be,
So come what may..."

I sat down in the middle of a half empty room
packed boxes and an empty cupboard
faded smell of the fragrances
tears swelled and I couldn't control

The heart sometimes deceives you
leads you on a whole different journey
we are all dealing with our very own demons
But morning will always come.

I've laid down my heart
Initially Loved you more than Love could  have ever known
I wasn't expecting to turn my heart around
Now I'm dizzy and I cant see straight
Even my heart has gone cold...

The road to redemption isn't far
The road to recovery is near
I am definitely stronger than I seem
and this hole in my heart will be...

Will be... but a memory...

Ocean of Tears

Heartache after Heartache
Sleepless nights
I am now numb...

Constantly consumed in lies
reached to the brim
forgive but don't forget!

I can be stupid!
I can sometimes be over foolish too!
I wont allow anyone to get close now...

You made me build walls where there were none
You meant everything to me
But now you're gone...

I cry less each time I get hurt
The pain is only temporary
and I continue to love you less...

You have watched me drown
In my ocean of tears
beneath the lies you placed...

You were everything I needed
But now no more...

I need to protect myself now
Love myself
Make me a priority!

I will miss you
But this hurt will be gone
and I will move on...

erase the scars with the strength
I will find to face~

Beats fast

I was just reminded a few days ago that:
"It's always darkest before the dawn"
And I really thought my dawn was breaking
Until it got even darker.

A flip-side to my pleas to the universe...

The ricochets of a broken pieces
splatter of blood everywhere
only this time...
It's my blood!

When certain things hurt
It hurts so bad,
You saw the proof in the way it hurts
BUT it was all a game!
I'm numb...

The worst in me probably brings out the worse in you
but the best in me wants to trust you again
If only I was enough for you!

I don't react the way you always expect
I am stubborn sometimes too
I saw stars in you
It knocked me down instead...

You thought I was just passing through
for this heart break and misery?
But I still know I am not the only one...

Before I throw it all away
and say all these stupid things
Don't let me let you go
Even though I know this might be the right thing to do...